Four Secrets of a Forever Marriage – Book Launch!

Four secrets book

Friends of mine, Karen and Kevin Hardin are involved in the launch of this book. Though I have not yet read it, I have known the Hardin’s for many years, and have seen the excellence they walk in.

Order a copy of “Four Secrets to a Forever Marriage” on Amazon, July 21. Then email us your Amazon order # at to win one of five free sterling silver Unity Cross necklaces we are giving away TOMORROW ONLY! (retail value $130/ea)


TULSA, OK— In his early thirties, business entrepreneur, Michael Letney, had just closed the deal on a contract with one of the largest retailers in the world. He smiled as he walked out of their corporate offices little knowing that as he put his signature on the dotted line, he had just set into motion a roller coaster that would cost him his business, his financial stability and could have cost him his marriage.

The lessons learned during that season until now, from this “not-so-perfect” husband, restored the trust that had been broken with his wife and ultimately restored his marriage. They are lessons which are foundational to every successful marriage. In reality, they are four secrets that will transform any relationship.

Can it really be that simple? Yes!

Did you know that each year approximately 2.3 million couples will marry in America alone? That equals 6,200 weddings a day. These couples will spend over $72 billion collectively just to make sure that their special day is perfect.

But what is the “budget” couples create in regards to time, money and effort needed to ensure that the “after party of marriage” is as successful as the wedding day itself?

If couples will choose to make these four important principles an ongoing part of their relationship, they can transform their relationship to one in which their house truly becomes a home and where the two become one. The reward of such a marriage is happiness, wholeness and unity.

So what does it take? Transparency, truth and trust which in turn creates the reward of unity. Like four layers of a wedding cake, each build on the foundation of the other. Without one, you cannot achieve the other. They are all essential ingredients to achieve true unity and happiness for a forever marriage.

Many young people today say that “happily ever after” doesn’t exist. We agree. Fairy tales aren’t real, but a forever marriage can be, for those willing to apply the practical steps and inspiring message found in “Four Secrets to A Forever Marriage” where you can happily live a “forever after.”

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Being a pastor in university communities for over 34 years, I have performed numerous wedding ceremonies as well as engaged in numerous premarital counseling situations.

The books I assigned for counseling were and are good. But I wish that this book had been written. It brings more than just marriage insights, but reveals those insights through the grid of mistakes, pain, humiliation, and loss. “Four Secrets to a Forever Marriage” is a book that grabs your attention because it reveals not just the surface issues of loss, but the sobering “heart” issues that are foundational for every marriage and family.

I will be using this book as part of the premarital counseling the as well as a valued tool in helping husbands and wives build and rebuild their “Forever Marriage.” Michael and Barbie’s story will inspire and uplift you. I will be recommending this book to my friends and giving it as a gift to young couples.


Dr. Jim Burkett

President, Foundation Ministries International


This book is great… from a marriage perspective, business perspective and I can even see how it can benefit our nation as you talk about

the strength and importance of the marriage foundation.

All I can say is I am honored and excited to be able to help you promote this and highly recommend it.

LaVern Vivio

Author, Speaker, and former spokesperson on Glenn Beck’s “The Blaze”


As Seen On:

The Glenn Beck Show “The Blaze”

TLC Channel

The Wedding Vibe

Wedding Expo

The Wedding Guide

Thanks, Chris!!!


Karen Hardin

PriorityPR Group & Literary Agency



My Blog:



Four Secrets Final with spine

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Opposing Same-Sex Marriage

I believe Jesus loves all people. That He died for sinners, and that all of us have sinned. I also believe He calls us to repent, that is leave our life of sin, and pursue a life of honesty, honor, and holiness. That marriage is designed by God to be a covenant between a husband and a wife, God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.

Homosexuality then, is a sin for which Jesus died, and is willing to forgive, but is clearly a moral choice, between two consenting adults, that the Bible expressly forbids.

I do practicing homosexuals no service, and show no love towards them, if I do not tell them the truth: that what they are doing is wrong, and that while God fully understands their lifestyle, He will never condone it.

Here in Tulsa, the city council is trying to pass legislation recognizing a housing exemption for couples in same-sex relationships.

This is both morally and Biblically wrong, and I am encouraging Christians everywhere to stand with me in prayer against this legislation, and to sign this petition to our mayor.

If you are in an immoral relationship, and want to receive the love and grace of God to change, here is an article I wrote sharing the gospel.

It has been said, that if you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything.

Please stand for Jesus and truth in this, in prayer.

Internet Adultery

adulteryadultery_2adultery1Internet Adultery

Internet Adultery
Over the years, I have endeavored to walk in not only practical holiness, but purity of heart.
With respect to women, I have endeavored to keep ministerial boundaries, never ministering to someone of the opposite sex, unless my wife was present.
Yet, this new venue of ministry, Social Media, is exciting in that it allows us to reach many more people with the truth of the Word of God, quickly, and to develop on-line gospel relationships that have had tremendous impact for the kingdom of God!
Billy Graham used to instruct young ministers, regarding personal integrity, simply: Don’t touch the girls, (or guys, for you ladies) the gold, or the glory.
I remember, back in the days when I was single, running a ‘big-brothers’ club in a subsidized housing project. As a single young man, employed, who was obviously a role model for children, it was almost as natural as breathing, to get hit on by single mom’s, who were desperate for adult companionship, and a husband. Rather, that become brutal with them, and join the ‘He man women haters club’, I cried out to God for help, wisdom, and purity of heart.
James 1:27 Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.
This is the verse, we would use to get us out into the streets, to practically help, wherever possible. Notice, if you will, how this reads:
1. Want to be pure and undefiled before God our Father? (Emphatically, YES!)
2. Here’s what you need to do, go visit the fatherless and widow.
3. Where do you go visit them? Right in the middle of their mess, ‘in their distress’. It is implied here that we would become part of their solution, that we would do something to alleviate their suffering. This might be simply in taking the children fishing, swimming, or bike riding, while the mom gets a well needed rest, or simply goes out with the girls.
4. Here is the trick: remain unspotted from the world. That means: no flirting with the girls, staying clear of the alcohol/drug and often criminal culture that exists in some of these communities. Holiness of conduct and purity of heart, are the only thing that kept us, as people did everything in their power to try and get us in involved in some of their schemes. Many nights of anguished prayer, and countless hours listening to the audio Bible, to remain cleansed, renewed, and washed by the water of the Word, to stay mentally, emotionally, and spiritually clean from some very challenging ministry sessions.
During this time, God graciously delivered me from my traditional, flirtatious ways with women, granting me the ability to see all women as sisters, mothers, aunts, and grandmothers, treating them with honor, with no games.
Back in the days of youth ministry, we used to instruct singles, regarding purity of heart, that not only was sex outside of marriage sin, but that Jesus said: Mt 5:28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
This meant nor pornography, or sexual innuendos, or flirtatious behavior.
I remember making the statement: If you, in your conduct and conversations, awaken desires in a member of the opposite sex, that can only be legitimately fulfilled in a marriage relationship, it is sin to you, and you need to take it to the cross.
Yet, on Social Media, we see this type of conduct, all the time. People without shame, or boundaries, openly making provocative comments, that definitely incite romantic passions, publically, or in private messages, over the internet.
A good friend of mine, is fighting for his marriage.
In marriage counseling, he heard an alarming statistic: That 8 or 9, or every 10 divorces, brought Facebook posts, or copies of their unfaithful spouses Tweets, to court as evidence. Seems that folks had been having affairs, and keeping them going, using Social Media.
Seems this new rise in Social Media adultery, is not new to my world. Here are a couple of articles on it, that are well written:
Online Affairs Are Emotional Adultery

Finding a Lost Lover on the Internet: Easy to do, but Dangerous if You’re Married
I too, have been guilty, of this. In allowing women, other than my wife, access to my heart, at a level that should have only been available to my wife. To me, it is sin.
I think of the scene in the movie, ‘Fireproof’, where the guy smashes his computer because of his pornography addiction.
I am not into porn, I hate it. If you are, get out of it, it’s destroying you.
Yet, like my good friend, rather than deal with brutally difficult issues in my own marriage, I have carried on ‘spiritual’ conversations on Facebook and Twitter, at a level of intimacy, that should have been reserved only for my wife.
My good friend, deleted all of his Facebook and Twitter accounts, and blocked certain people from his phone and texts.
So, there is only one way of freedom for me, and that is to include my wife, on all of my accounts, and conversations on Social Media. Joint accounts, that keep me accountable for every word I post, or comment I make.
You know, many have said, that ‘Wisdom is the principal thing, and in all your getting get wisdom’. That is Biblical, but not totally accurate. The actual verse reads:Pr 4:5 Get wisdom, get understanding: forget it not; neither decline from the words of my mouth.
Pr 4:7 Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.
In all of your wisdom, get understanding.
Apart from Jesus, Solomon is recorded as being the wisest king that ever lived.
Yet, he blew it, in having many wives:1Ki 11:3 And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart.
1Ki 11:4 For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father.
Here is understanding. Wisdom did not keep his leadership pure, nor on track with God. Purity of heart, and faithfulness to one wife, would have.
Mal 2:14 Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.
Mal 2:15 And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.
My ministry to folks over Social Media will continue, but my wife will be reading every prayer request, post, and comment, that comes back from the teachings posted.
My marriage may not be perfect, but I will remain faithful to it, in the brutally hard times, as well as the good ones.
I pray you do the same:
Let’s Pray:
‘Father, I raise up a cry for marriages, families, husbands, wives and children. I ask Sir, that you deliver us from our lusts, the seductions that would creep in, and destroy our homes. Forgive us, where we have erred in this, and purify our hearts, minds, and relationships, from ungodly entanglements, and adulterous affairs, whether physical, or merely emotional. I ask this, knowing I am heard, for I ask in Your name Lord Jesus, AMEN!’